When a community disaster strikes—whether it’s a flood, a fire, a shooting, or another tragedy—the whole family can feel shaken. For children who are already grieving the death of someone close, these events may hit even harder. They can reinforce fears that the world isn’t safe, stir up memories of loss, or make it harder to get through everyday life.
One of the most powerful tools you have as a caregiver is the ability to offer a sense of safety through predictability, reliability, and consistency. . This doesn’t mean pretending nothing happened or that everything is just fine. It means creating steady touchpoints your child can count on while the world feels unpredictable.
1. Anchor in honesty and reassurance.
- Acknowledge what’s happening in clear and simple terms. Even a statement like, “There was a flood in our state, and people are hurting.” can be the explanation your child needs at that moment. Or perhaps it could be the start of a deeper conversation.”
- Balance honesty with reassurance. Avoid big promises like “nothing bad will ever happen.” Instead, try: “Bad things do happen, and when they do, we will always face them together.”
2. Limit the media swirl.
Disaster headlines can be overwhelming for anyone, but for grieving kids they can feel like constant reminders that the world is unsafe.
- Limit TV and scrolling news when possible. Instead of demanding their phone, invite them to go on a walk, play in nature, or do a soothing activity.
- Invite your child to ask questions directly rather than overhearing bits and pieces. Say, “Do you have any questions about what happened? If you don’t have any questions now, that’s okay too. I’m here whenever you’re ready.””
- Let them know it’s okay to step away from the noise. Say, “How about we go and do something together?”
3. Rebuild daily routines.
Grieving children often feel steadier when they know what to expect. After a disaster, look for small ways to put rhythm back into their day.
- Keep bedtimes and mealtimes as consistent as possible.
- Reinstate rituals they enjoy—Friday movie night, Saturday pancakes, evening walks.
- Offer them choices so they feel some control: “Do you want to eat dinner at the table or outside tonight?”
4. Create safety signals.
Sometimes safety isn’t about words, but about actions and reminders.
- Physical safety: a favorite blanket, a nightlight, or even a family pet nearby.
- Relational safety: extra hugs, check-ins, or a whispered, “I’m right here.”
- Environmental safety: quiet time in a familiar space, or returning to an activity they love (sports, art, music).
- Watch for signs they need more support.
It’s normal for kids to feel scared, sad, or anxious after a disaster. But if you notice big changes in sleep, eating, or behavior lasting more than a few weeks, it may help to reach out to a grief-informed counselor, school social worker, or pediatrician.
You can’t erase the impact of a disaster, but you can help your child feel steadied within it. For grieving kids, consistency, presence, and small rituals of safety matter more than perfect words. Every time you show up, you’re reminding them: “Even when the world feels uncertain, you can count on me.”
CJ Tropp is a Clinical Manager for Experience Camps, and has nearly 15 years of experience working in the nonprofit sector. He recently earned his MSW from Columbia University School of Social Work, where he discovered his passion for supporting grieving children and families. Prior to Experience Camps, CJ worked in a variety of programmatic and partnership-focused roles including the Food Network South Beach & New York City Wine & Food Festivals, and the hit Broadway musical, “Dear Evan Hansen.”
