It’s no big surprise that Mother’s Day can be hard for someone grieving the death of their mom or mother-like figure in their lives. While there’s no one perfect thing to say, below are several offerings that many grievers have told us feel supportive. Can’t decide which one to pick? Go with your gut, and just know that the real point is making the effort to reach out and say something (and might we suggest the last one if you’re still unsure).

• It’s Mother’s Day, and I don’t want to presume to know how you’re feeling. So I’m calling to find out and let you know I’m here for you.
• I was thinking about how your mom always loved to say “[fill in the blank]!” and I still smile when I think about it. I am thinking of her and you extra hard today.
• Can we get a time on the calendar in the next couple weeks to tell stories about your mom and/or look at pictures of her? If that feels good to you?
• You and your mom were so close [if this was true], and I’m thinking of the two of you and your relationship today. 
• You are such a wonderful person, and I know your mom must be so proud of you.
• I’m remembering your mom today. Do you remember the time we [fill in the blank] with your mom? That was such a [silly/funny/crazy] time! 
• Man, I miss your mom, and I sure do love you! 
• When I look at you, I see your mom’s [big smile/warm eyes/kind energy, etc.] Thinking about you today!
• I don’t know how you’re feeling today, or how you will feel, but I’m here for you and feel free to keep me on speed dial.
• In case you’re getting bombarded with Mother’s Day ads and messaging, I’m happy to primal scream with you. 
• I’m thinking of you on Mother’s Day, and I don’t have any eloquent words but you’re on my mind, and I care about you so much!